making a play with a glossy concept using an old formula,
one more tired time
Patriotic,
freedom loving and with a hollow core surrounded by greed
touting civil liberties while greasing insider deals with
local officials
Bringing on
the bulldozers and chuckling at the foolish liberals
riding in a new car with tinted windows up and cellphone to
their ear
driving up
property taxes and then stealing property from the old folks and the ranchers
effusive and very talkative, a good friend unless you might
really need them
without any
legal responsibility but, self-entitled to a percentage of your cash
highly gifted with people skills and the ability to
recognize their moneyed prey
overwhelming
drives for new cars, boats, fine clothes and flashy jewelry
committed to your best interests so long as, and until, a
fat cut comes their way
not afraid to
disdain you should you be slow in forking up the coin
demanding 6 or 7% of your total proceeds and urging you to
move quickly
they are not
responsible for a single technical aspect of your contract
always pronouncing that it is a great time to buy…..as well
as the best to sell
playing fast
and loose with their self-granted moniker of ‘Professional’
helping the tired cookiecutter developers move more
overpriced McMansions
slicing off
fat commissions from destroying farms and draining wetlands
greasing the skids with crooked loan companies and
incompetent inspectors
proudly
displaying plastic patriotic decals on new foreign luxury cars
talking of upcoming spiritual journeys while drinking $5
coffee from throwaway cups
attending
overpriced sales seminars at fancy resorts and writing it off as Continuing
Education
they’re licensed and regulated and you need to believe
that what they do makes sense
they spend
thousands on decorators, facelifts, electronics and vacations
see them at the phony health spas and hear them at their
expensive restaurants
know well
they work for themselves and not for either the buyer or the seller
they thrive upon generating some false sense of urgency to
close the deal
they shortcut
sweet offerings to insiders before a listing even goes public
knowing every property’s issues they do not reveal them and
they cannot be held liable
hear them
sermonize on how vital they are to our very way of life
watch them shake their heads over extra costs appearing at
your closing
see their
grasping, smarmy smiles everywhere on For Sale signs, billboards and newspapers
listen to their hollow spiel in praise of ‘full service brokerage agents’
hear their
talk of guiding you through the pitfalls of the deliberately obfuscated process
only the most cutthroat of whores can survive their
phonied-up competition
see them at
the council meetings extolling unrestriced development
sizing up potential contacts like a con looking for a
hapless mark
sending out
mass mailings trolling for victims with touched-up pictures
mortgaging our futures with slick slogans aimed at hyped
hopes and manufactured dreams
wheedling and
cajoling, sucking-up and fawning like shameless dogs – until closing
they take pains to talk of their children, churches and
their hobbies
they‘ve convinced themselves that
they are productive members of the community
committed to the notion that their Ponzi scheme is integral
to our progress
silent on the
real issues but effusive about their fantasy-laden lifestyles
maintaining expensive habits to project what is really a
cheap and ignorant illusion of success
getting out
after many years and then declaring it a filthy rat race
asking about your children by their names as you ride in
their cars
telling you
of their families while omitting important property details
rhapsodizing about the dropdead views that they know will
soon be hidden by houses forever
not
returning your plaintive calls once the closing has been completed
pushing the timeless beauty of the land that they so eagerly
help to destroy
gushing over
the free scenery they are pimping but are soon to set the bulldozers upon
recovering percent reductions through kickbacks of phony
closing costs
desperate for another sale to pay
down the credit cards that support their phony lifestyles
quick with pictures of the kids and stories of a beloved but
departed puppy
code talking on their cellphones
cause there’s a bigger bite on another line
making vague promises disavowed with a kindly smile when
it’s just too late
taking time
out for jesus and the big-screen TV at home
pillars of the community who disavow any community planning
beyond blurry artist conceptions
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